Insomnia

So...Here it is 2 days before my wedding.  My rehersal is today.  It is currently 3:20am and for some unknown reason...I can't sleep (been up since 2:30).  I am so excited to see my friend and her son.  Excited to see my family.  Uber excited to be away from my crazy job for this next week.  I just don't know which direction I am going right now. UGGGG.  I am on some kind of high it seems like. I have never felt like this before.  I wish I could just curl up and...I don't know...I feel like laughing, crying, and screaming all at the same time so....here it goes...HAHAHAHAHAHAHA,  WAHHHHHHHHHH,  AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!  There I feel better, NOT (never really felt bad).  I feel great though actually.  I feel at peace.  So here it is...about to take the first step into my new life.  I will end here and try to get some sleep (My last day at work is today).

Love to all,

Merry Christams If I don't post anything over the next week.

WEDDING !!!

So....my future cousin in-law asked me to post more about my wedding so...here it goes...

Here is the ring...bought at Shane Co.  It is an Ice Blue Sapphire.  The blue color is my favorite which is why he picked it.

The side of the ring has tiny diamonds in it  LOVE IT !!!

Here is the dress.  Bought at David's Bridal...I wish you could see the detail in the beading...sooooo pretty.

The train...long with lots of beading....The veil has beading in it that matches the dress perfectly.  I was trying this dress on and I said "It makes me look skinny".  The woman that was helping said..."You are in a size 6...there is nothing fat about you".  LoL.  Yes I did just let everyone know what size I wear...I am a brave woman.

The church....Highland Baptist Church.  Love the congregation and beauty of this church (yes this is our church home).  If any of you lives in or visits Louisville, KY you should make a visit.  We were at the church picking out our organ music when I took this picture.

My Maid of Honor and dearest friend and her son, my little Ring Bearer.  I wish I had pictures of everone else in my bridal party but I can't find any with just them...only group pictures.  The Bridesmaid will be the groom's step sister.  The Best Man will be the groom's father.  Groomsman will be my brother.  Small bridal party, yes, but I am so happy with it.

I don't have pictures of the hall but it is really pretty with white table linens and a few green trees with white lights on them.  There are white lights all over the room.  A stage will hold our disc changer that we are using for the music as DJ's are outrageous pricewise.  I wanted to sing at the wedding but I have been unable to find music to use for the song. I still have a few minor thigs to run out and pick up but it won't take too much to do.

I am getting more excited by the day...nervous too.  Not really nervous about getting married, just nervous about something going wrong at some point through the ceremony or reception.  I know I will be so happy when this is all over and I can begin my life as a MRS.  It will be an adjustment for sure but I am so ready for the excitement of it all.  New Life, New Family, New Name.  So many details.

Me and My Husband (WOW, sounds great to say that).  He never stops making me laugh.  He never stops driving me bonkers.  Most important, He never stops loving me.  He is truly a rarity....a decent Christian man who would give anything he had if he could help a loved one.  No one could have been a better gift from God.

I have to make mention that Sarah Ruth and her sister (this is the three of us at our Christmas party last year)

 introduced me to the groom the day before I moved in with them at their great grandmother's 97th birthday party.  Sarah kept telling me...."wait till you meet my cousin Eric...you will just love him"...I think she had a plan from the beginning...Hahaha

Love to all...and I will be sure to post pictures after this shindig is finished.

With God's love...

WAITING !!!

So...here I am yet again waiting for my future husband to get home.  Waiting to eat dinner with him.  Waiting for 10 more days to spend my life with him.  Everyone has heard the saying "patience is a virtue",unfortunately, it is a virtue I do not posess.  I get so angry sometimes because it seems like I am always waiting on him to get his big rig fixed before he comes home....hurry up and wait thats is a truckdriver's life...so true.  I wish I could find a way to let this go....just sit with my mouth shut and just deal with it.  Easier said than done.  For those of you who are able to chill out and wait for anything...Cherish that ability.  For those of you like me....STOP IT !!!  Just sit and wait.  I know it is not so easy to do...just take a breath and WAIT.  Pray for patience...or knowledge so you know how do deal with it.

Sorry for the short post but I am a busy woman trying to nail down last minute wedding details...love to all.

Peace and Harmony

LIVE !!!

So...my future grandfather (in law) and grandmother (in law)  are in the hospital and pretty sick.  I am reminded every day how short and precious life is and wonder how someone can take their own.  I don't have the greatest life or the best...but I feel I have the richest.  This is because I pray to God everyday to help me through.  Guide me.  I feel in my heart that I am on the path he has chosen for me.  That fact alone is means for me to face another day.  To get up and go to yet another day at my crappy job.  Yet another line at the supermarket.  It all seems so daunting when it is all you focus on, however, if you focus on God and the love of those around you....there is so much in this world to live for and nothing is worth the pain you will leave to those you love should you choose to end life your self.  And really...Who are we to play God for ourselves?...or others for that matter?  I will not  lie and say I have never thought about taking my life (or tried).  I have just learned that it isn't worth it.

I know this is a short post but I hope you take something away from it.  Think of your favorite thing (person, food, sport) and ask yourself...Would I miss this if I didn't have it?  If your answer is yes...then that is your thing to live for.  Another thing that was just so graciously pointed out to me was my wording in the last sentance...You should ALWAYS live for God, however, if God is not a strong presence in your life then FIND SOMETHING !!!  Now I go and leave you with the words of Spock "Live long and prosper"

Loves a Million

ENJOY !

Today is the day before my bridal shower.  I never really wanted one because to me it is not necessary.  My future sister in-law told me "we have to throw a shower for you".  I was grateful for it because I don't know too many people here.  I am getting more nervous and excited as my wedding gets closer. 15 more days now.  I am sitting at my house with the man I love watching T.V. (we painted the town last night because, surprise, I had another horrible day at work) beside me.  It is a beautiful day out and eventually we have things we need to get done but right now we are enjoying a lazy day inside talking about how pretty it is and how nice it would be to go outside.  I love days like this when life is slow and all you have to do is sit back and be happy.  Life should always be enjoyed.

I am loving my life in this photo.  Which reminds me...today might be a good day for a hike (AND A GOOD CUPPA JOE BECAUSE IT IS CHILLY OUT).

Get outside and love the day God has given you.

Love to all

 

Work

Ok...so this is going to be another not so feel good post. I apologize in advance...

The hospital I work at has many buildings in the same area...today I got sent to a buiding I have only worked at a few times (no big deal right). I get there and there is one other girl there (this is the start of the shift at 7am)...we go through and get quite a bit of work done thinking we will be the only two there. Come around 9 am three other girls show up (five is about two people too many to cover this area...and the shift is suppossed to start at 7). So now here we are...overstaffed and my normal building is hurting for people. I call and I was told to come back over. I got my work assignment for the day (which is a normal days work even though I started almost two and a half hours late). I bust my butt to catch up and when I do a get asked "Amanda can you"? "Amanda will you"? Well guess what...from now on...Amanda won't and Amanda can't !!!! Do any of you have a job like this? You work well and you work hard so they work you harder and expect the same quality? Why is it that people who do nothing all the time but make 1 nice gesture get recognized but the people who consistantly work their bum off get no recognition? I am not asking for a raise..not asking for Employee of the Year (ok maybe I am)...really though...Just a "Thank you for your extra work today, you were a huge help, I appreciate you for it." would be good. Right now I want to say THANK YOU to the people who work hard and do what they should. Be proud of what you do (even if you are just a housewife and don't get paid...keeping up the house and kids is hard work). I am thankful to be working...I just hope one day my work ethic gets noticed and rewarded (monetarily if I am blessed enough).

Love to all. May you be thankful for your day jobs.

Prayers and Hugs

DRIVE !!!!

I  want to start off by saying that today's post will not be some inspirational heartfelt message.  Sorry for those who may have expected that...it is posts like this that make my blog title accurate.....Here it goes.

Why is it that people just do not know how to drive in the rain ?!  I am on my way home from work and an idiot with NO HEADLIGHTS ON and using NO TURN SIGNAL (mind you again it is raining and hard to see) throws his car right in front of me to take and exit on the expressway.  I am glad I am a defensive driver and was paying some attention to him ( as, I have to say it again, HE HAD NO HEAD LIGHTS TURNED ON !!!).  I am sorry to rant but do people like this have NO respect for other drivers?  Keep in mind I am writing this post with full awareness that I have a little bit of a lead foot and I know I am not perfect.  It just scares me to death when I see someone driving unsafely when the conditions are bad to begin with.  The state of Kentucky (where I live) has a count down of deaths on Kentucky streets on a lit up sign above the interstate.  The count is at 707 for the year after being at 702 just yesterday.  It is drivers like this that cause those fatal accidents.  I know in a previous post I wrote about forgiving the crazy driver because you just do not know what is going on in their lives but COME ON...there is a fine line between a mistake made during a bad day and just plain old neglectful driving.  I live in Louisville and if you know anything about a born and raised Louisville driver....most of them....DON'T USE TURN SIGNALS.  Please remember this is for your safety and so others around you can drive safely themselves.  Love those around you enough to drive the right way and be safe. 

I will now climb out of this booster seat that is my soap box and say....Drive safe. 

                                    Love to all and may none of you become a fatal crash statistic.


                                                                     Hugs and prayers.